January 2012
4 posts
December 2011
2 posts
November 2011
20 posts
At the halloween block party with 400,000 people in West Hollywood this year, I came across a young man with an age old costume “free mammograms” with the usual cardboard box around his head and two dips cut out for boobs to rest on, naturally putting his face in the motorboat position. I asked him how many takers he had. He smiled big and said “sixteen so far!”
I think I...
I’m going to write a self help book called “Desperate People Will Buy Anything”
October 2011
33 posts
7 tags
Buy my super funny Cd on itunes, my minions!! →
“Talent alone won’t make you a success. Neither will being in the right place at the right time, unless you are ready,” Carson said. “The most important question is: ‘Are you ready?’”
My next gig is being broadcast live to Omicron Persei 8!
Last night I hit an orange cone on the highway with my car, smashed my blinker light and broke my drive and tension belt, every emergency light on my dash lit up at once and my steering locked - luckily this happened on the 101 highway so it was merely extremely scary and dangerous. I made it to the break down lane, and today awaiting a monstrous repair bill. Anyone know a bank I can rob?
